Dissatisfied with his current love life, Brian decides to slow things down when he meets the girl of his dreams, Carolyn. However, Cleveland soon sweeps Carolyn off her feet, and Brian must do anything he can do, to win her back, even if it means involving Cleveland's ex-wife, Loretta.

When Peter re-discovers his love for the painfully annoying yet seductively catchy tune "Surfin' Bird," Brian and Stewie decide to take matters into their own hands to ensure that the song will never be heard again! On the verge of tears, Peter goes to every record store in Quahog to track down his beloved jingle, and he runs into a familiar face and ends up hanging out with Jesus Christ.

Mort Goldman accidentally steps into Stewie's time machine and goes back in time to 1939 Poland, and Brian and Stewie follow to retrieve him. When they find him, the Nazis invade and Mort is taken to Germany, where Stewie and Brian must go to save him, as well as find a way back to the present.

Peter gets a lasting supply of gasoline for the year, so the family decides to use it to take a road trip to the Grand Canyon. They pack up and hit the road, but it takes them a while to realize that they had forgotten to bring Stewie with them; when they do, they must make their way home posthaste.

Eight-year-old Brian (who is 56 in dog years) seems to have lost a step or two, so Peter gets a new talking dog, New Brian, to "take some of the load off" the old one, who doesn't like the idea at all.

Peter's boss Angela sends him back to the third grade so that he can qualify for a work promotion. Meanwhile, Brian, Frank Sinatra Jr. and Stewie open the coolest club in Quahog.

After being pregnant for seven years, Bonnie finally gives birth to a beautiful baby girl named Susie! Stewie quickly falls for the little tyke and vows to do anything to win her heart and get in her diaper. Meanwhile, Joe borrows $20,000 from a bookie to pay for Bonnie's medical bills, but then plans to steal the money from Mr. Pewterschmidt to pay his debt.

After buying a brain-damaged horse, which causes over $100,000 worth of damage, Peter participates in medical experiments to make some extra cash. One of the genes he is injected with turns him gay, which later results in him leaving Lois for another man. Although the family is crushed, they quickly realise the most important thing is that Peter is happy.

Peter finds an old winning raffle ticket from 1989 that entitles him a golf outing with O.J. Simpson. After befriending him, Peter brings O.J. home home to meet the family. However, the people of Quahog aren't too fond of the former running back.

Lois gets a job working for FOX News and has to do a report on a liberal filmmaker. However, she loses the job when her story implicates a conservative radio host.

Meg becomes extremely religious, and tries to convert Brian from Atheism. Meanwhile, after the family visits a Star Trek convention, Stewie kidnaps the entire cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation and forces them to hang out with him.

Brian and Stewie attempt to rally Quahog to try and legalize marijuana.

Stewie starts going to the gym with Peter after he gets beaten up by Joe's baby daughter Susie, but just when it seems that his hard work is paying off, Peter reveals that he's been giving him anabolic steroid. Meanwhile, Chris begins dating a popular girl at school, only to see her popularity subside.

When Brian discovers that his beloved Jillian is getting married, he hits the sauce to drown his sorrows. The next morning, he wakes up with more than a hangover. After realizing he has hooked up with "The Hills" star Lauren Conrad, he wants to run and hide. When Brian discovers Lauren is nothing like how she's portrayed on TV, he thinks he may have found his perfect match – if only he can let Jillian go.

Peter learns from a psychic through a palm reading that he had a fascinating past life in the 17th century as Griffin Peterson, a dignified English gentleman who vied for the love of Lady Redbush in the newly founded American colony of Quahog.