When the guys take Bobby to a college football game, their hijinks land them in a VIP box suite and calling plays for the visiting team.

To impress a girl, Bobby protests against soda machines in the school. However, since the teachers have been using the drink machine money to pay for their "retreat", they decide to fight back. Meanwhile, Dale decides to record his friends' witty quotes and put them all in a book.

Arlen is hit by a heat wave and Hank and the gang take the kids to the water park. Unfortunately, when they have to tangle with a group of surfer bullies, Boomhauer, who is usually cool, winds up embarrassing himself. Meanwhile, Bill becomes known as the famous "Heat-Waver" when he begins to stand on the side of the highway and wave to motorists.

When the family goes out to a restaurant where the food is cooked at the table Cotton throws a tantrum and gets into a fight with the chef. The fight leaves Cotton near death in the hospital.

After Hank falls in love with organic food he starts his own mini co-op garden in his back yard.

Bobby gets mixed up with racial intolerance at Tom Landry Junior High. Meanwhile, Lucky hurts himself by catching a frisbee made of barbed wire and the gang has to convince him to go to the hospital.

Minh joins the Arlen Gun Club so that she can practice her skeet-shooting skills and become a member of the Nine Rivers Country Club team. However, Minh loses track of the goal when she starts to identify with her "hillbilly" neighbors.

After they have financial troubles, Nancy convinces Dale to go on a "vocation vacation" to learn a new career. Unfortunately, Dale picks basket-weaving, and he's not very good at it. Meanwhile, Peggy, Bill and Kahn try to create the next great Internet video.

Ladybird is put on a list of vicious dogs after she gets a little crazy and bites Hank. Afterwards, Hank is urged by a veterinarian to take Ladybird to a "dog spiritualist".

Hank helps Buck Strickland battle the Arlen City Council and a rival restaurant after "Sugarfoots" loses its business due to a local ban on the sale of foods containing trans fats.

Bill falls in love after he has a blind date with Charlene, a hot single mother. However, Dale's intuition tells him something is not quite right with the whole situation.

Hank buys Peggy a new car, and like he has always done he pays sticker price for it. However, after he realizes that he has been ripped off for years, he plots revenge against the car salesman.

Hank's agrees to speak at Enrique's daughter's quinceañera. However, some of Peggy's real-estate clients fall in love with the quaint Mexican neighborhood and start to move in.

Peggy becomes over-protective after a child goes missing in Arlen.

Kahn escapes to the bar and takes up Karaoke after Minh's father comes to visit. Meanwhile, Bobby and Peggy compete in an escalating game where they try to outdo each other.

Peggy has trouble selling a house when she realizes that the current residents are scaring away the buyers, so she hires actors to play their parts.

Dale's son becomes the star quarterback for Landry High School, but Dale pushes the boy to accept a private school's offer, which includes a cash contract.

Stressed that her birthday parties never live up to her expectations, Peggy plans herself a disco-themed party on a mystery train, but after Luanne ruins the surprise, Peggy worries her parties will always end badly. However, a new mystery arises after a couple sneaks away for some private time in the train bathroom, and the partygoers must figure out who did it.

Bobby has to work as a deputy for the school's police officer after he is framed for throwing a soda can. Meanwhile, Hank accidentally takes the wallet of a man he thought stole his own wallet, however when he tries to return the wallet the man does not take it too well.

Wanting to spend some quality time with his son, Hank distracts Dale, Bill and Boomhauer with a boat building competition. However, when bats attack the construction garage, Hank has to give up his idea of spending time with Bobby.

Luanne's long-lost father and Peggy's brother Hoyt, a two-strike felon, comes to Arlen. After Hoyt gets caught committing another crime, Lucky feels bad and takes the blame, leaving Hoyt free to continue his life of crime.